In the forest where none may pass but
you, your bones have been drained of their sunlight. You journey into dusky
voices; they call your name, and point the path to follow. Instinctively you
know you must ripple like a memory through your own veins, a small, barely
perceptible quiver, moving through the convoluted darkness alone. Moments shy
away from you now, receding like an ever-shrinking spine,
and you must quickly pay homage to your body, the vessel of you, so leaden with
your blessings and your shortcomings, miraculously afloat after endless storms.
As gently as liquid you pour into your feet, saluting them for resolutely
walking the decades. In the moment you pass through them they are warm,
pulsating like dance; then you are gone and the toes separate like strangers,
cold and indifferent, oblivious to your presence. You move on, aghast, unable
to look back.
You are a throb in your ankles now,
twitching, rising, until you are clutching at your slippery knees. You pause
with them a moment to rekindle the hours knelt in prayer. Soon you are on your
way, humming through your brittle joints, momentarily reminiscing days that
boasted limbs with the waxy-softness of saplings. You whisk through your loins
now, with the rush of a stallion that has no need to pause at this place
anymore. There is no longer a water trough here, and the memory is lost of the
fruit you bore long ago, fruit that is now as quickly shrivelling as you are.
Next you hover at the rim of your
stomach, an angry whirlpool that sucks you into its gurgling depths. Up you
paddle, faster, faster, resurfacing, eager to be free from its endless
mutterings. You can hear your heartbeat now, the echo of its pebbles reverberating
in some distant well—plop, plop, plop. You undulate towards it, tired of the
heavy darkness of being, seeking the light—and the lightness. It is hard to
face your heart this moment, for it knows too much about you, has harboured
your demons and your angels. You know when you leave it behind all that will be
left will be of lightning swiftness, a hint of an eye-blink and no more. You kiss, abrupt as doubtful lovers, and move on; the
voices are beckoning you to hasten.
Into your chest you spin at full force.
You feel the rush of purpose now, propelled by the urgency of the moment, but
nipped by a tugging fear; what lies
ahead? Whatever it may be, there is no time to contemplate on past or present
or future. The voices are hushed now and your body parts are stilled. All that
is left as you gasp into your throat is trembling silence; your mouth solemnly
opens to release you to an unspoken otherness. You have made your circular
journey, a journey which began long before you did, and leads you home, the
solitary traveller of your own night, in a forest that bears only your name.